How to support ageing parents: signs, conversations and practical help

Why supporting ageing parents can feel overwhelming

Realising your parents are getting older can bring up a mix of emotions: concern, responsibility, sadness, even uncertainty about what to do next. And for many people, it doesn’t happen all at once. It builds gradually.

While you might be able to manage your role as a tech support hotline, things can get real quite quickly and it’s good to have some early conversations.

Learn how to support someone going through a health challenge

How to talk to ageing parents about their health and support needs

Starting the conversation can feel daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. A calm, thoughtful approach goes a long way.

Keep it simple:

• Start early (not in a crisis): It’s easier to talk things through when there’s no immediate pressure.
• Lead with care, not control: Frame it around support, not telling them what to do.
• Pick the right moment and choose a relaxed setting: Does mum love a coffee, does dad love a walk?
• Respect their independence: Offer support but keep them in the driver’s seat, with their music on.
• Ask, don’t assume: Try opening the conversation with questions:
  “How have you been feeling lately?”
  “Do you feel confident in your health cover?”

Start small and take it step by step, you don’t need to cover everything at once.

A simple place to start? Reviewing their health cover together can be an easy, practical first step, and often leads into bigger conversations.

Navigating private health insurance for ageing parents

Educating yourself on private health cover can help you feel confident your parents will be looked after in a crisis. It also provides important insight for you on your own health cover, and a reminder to get your check-ups in order (do we sound like a parent now?).

If you’re supporting an ageing parent, a quick policy health check can help you feel confident they’re covered when it matters most. It acts as a review of current cover and gives you and your parents the chance to speak with an expert (a real human, in case they ask) on current cover and the best value option for what they need. Before you book this in though, it’s a good idea to have a health snapshot ready, this will help make sure your parents are covered for things related to their current health situation and lifestyle. Move over movie night, learning about your family’s health history is where the bonding truly begins!

Insider tips from HBF on getting the most value out of your cover

Understanding your parents’ health and history

Tennis elbow, cataracts, polyps present – things are about to get real, but you’re ready. When it comes to your parents’ health cover, once you know their health history you can help them reassess their health cover options, coming out assured that they’re getting both value and peace of mind.

A checklist to get started:

• Age
• Major health conditions, including mental health
• Details of health conditions and status of said condition (medication etc)
• Cancer specific questions (age of diagnosis, status, genetic, future outcomes)
• Any genetic conditions?
• Background and lifestyle (alcohol, smoking)
• Exercise status (contact sports, how much exercise per week)

Top tip: This could be AI’s time to shine, have Chat GPT or the likes create a checklist you can print out and keep track of with your parents. It could even manage medications and appointments.

Signs your ageing parent may need extra support

It can be hard to know when to step in. Often, the need for support builds gradually rather than appearing all at once. The best thing you can do, is pay attention to small changes. This can help you act early, before things reach a crisis point.

Some common signs to look out for include:

• Changes in mobility, memory or mood
  You might notice your parent becoming more unsteady on their feet, more forgetful than usual, or experiencing shifts in mood such as increased anxiety, withdrawal or irritability.
• Struggling with daily tasks
  Difficulty managing everyday activities—like preparing meals, keeping up with housework, taking medications, or getting to appointments—can signal they may need extra help. Aged care services in Australia are designed to support these daily living needs and help people maintain independence.¹
• Increased isolation
  If your parent is going out less, losing interest in hobbies, or becoming more socially withdrawn, it can impact both their physical and mental wellbeing.

It’s important to remember that support doesn’t have to mean a complete loss of independence. In many cases, it simply means introducing the right level of help to keep your parent safe, well and living the life they love.

A few extra support tips

Supporting ageing parents can include helping with their health, day-to-day tasks, emotional wellbeing and planning for the future. For many people, this might mean having regular check-ins, helping manage appointments or medications, or making sure the right support services are in place.

Some extra ways to support parents (without smothering) might look like:

• Do they need help keeping track of appointments, or setting up their calendar with reminders?
• Could AI help navigate some of the medical jargon or language used in reports or appointments?
• Could you offer to attend an appointment with them if they seem nervous?
• Could you exercise together, even join them for a walk?
• If you’re looking for information that explains help at home, aged care homes, finding providers and assessments check out My Aged Care.

How to use AI safely when it comes to your health

Don’t forget your own wellbeing

While it may seem easier said than done, finding time to look after your own mental health when life involves overwhelm is very important. This could look like exercise, time enjoying a hobby or a soak in the bath, or maybe a remedial massage. Make sure you recognise your feelings of worry (they are valid) and look after your wellbeing.  Fill your cup, as they say.

A stress-melting body scan for the mind and body